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Friday, February 17, 2006


They are not kidding. You really can fix anything with Duct Tape. (Or is it "Duck Tape?" I've never been certain.) I have used it to repair the turn signals on my motorcycle. I've repaired the seat on an old car I use to have with it. I taped my wounded exhaust pipe up with it on a VERY temporary basis. (Note to self: Duct tape melts.) I've used it to hold a multiplicity of things up. You know what I mean. "Up" means where ever something is supposed to be but is not. I use it as a part of youth group games on a very regular basis. Which brings us to tonight's story.

She came to me with a pathetic look on her face. She's just a young kid. A teenager. Full of life, energy, and a generous helping of bull. If you know what I mean. But this time she wasn't kidding. She was wearing one of those pairs of jeans that you are pretty sure "The Gap" pulled out of a trash bin someplace and hung on a rack with a $59.99 price tag on it. They had holes everywhere. And yet she had managed to add one more hole in a place where holes do not belong. She ripped one where she sits. And, as I said, she looked pathetic. She asked if I happened to have a safety pin. Well, I didn't exactly examine this hole in her jeans. When she pointed to its location I decided that this was a situation best left to herself and a girlfriend. I told her I would see what I could come up with.

The best I could do was ... a stapler. She gave me "that look." But she also took the stapler and went into the ladies room with her friend. She came out with a renewed look of disgust. The stapler had failed. Somebody happened by at just about that moment and tossed her a roll of Duct Tape. Good old silver Duct Tape.

My young friend broke into a smile and trotted off to the ladies room again. The next time I saw her, about 5 minutes later, she had an even bigger smile. And she was walking rather stiffly. She had transformed her renegade tear into a mark of glory. She was a testimony to good old American ingenuity. I'd rather not try to explain. Just take a look at her picture.

You know, I really have to hand it to her. Not only did she fix her jeans but she became instantly popular with every kid in the room. Fifty of them. It would appear that Duct Tape is cool. Hey, it works for me. It has to be better than stapling your jeans to your butt.