Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Baseball 1 - Ron 0 (1st inning)

It has been so tempting for so long. I stand on the balcony and stare out at the lake, baseball in hand. I can do it. I know I can do it. I cannot tell exactly how many feet it is but I know it's reachable. By me.

Years ago I was in an Eddie Bauer store at some suburban shopping mall and they were selling off a bunch of brown baseballs. Yeah. Brown. I suppose it was suppose to be trendy or something. I bought one. Or two. Or six. But I have one left and I brought it to Cleveland with me when I relocated.

Well, the lake is brown. The baseball is brown. It seemed like a natural fit. I've been carrying this baseball around for half a decade now. It is time for it to take its rightful place. And today ... was the day.

I really thought today was the day.

I stood on the balcony, measuring the throw. No, I wasn't trying to keep from over-throwing the lake. Duh. I was trying to figure out how to get maximum velocity and distance without smashing my hand on the frame of the patio door behind me or the railing of iron in front of me. I took practice throws without the baseball. I loosened up. I prayed over my rotor cuff. I took the baseball in hand. It felt so good. Just like it did back in high school.

I can do this.

I gripped the ball. I wound up as best I could in the small area. I went directly over hand and released the ball at the point of maximum lift and speed. Oh how she flew. Debbie let out a little gasp. (THAT made my day. Actually, it made my life!) We watched her soar off toward her watery grave. It was a certain "slam dunk." (Pun intended.)

And then it landed on the grass. Yeah, the grass. About 30 feet short of the water. It didn't bounce. It didn't roll. It landed with a thud and lay there in the grass. If ever a baseball felt ashamed, this one did. And it should have. I KNOW I threw it hard enough. Obviously this ball is aerodynamically challenged.

There will be a round two. It's only May. This baseball WILL be in the lake before the first of summer.

Come on. That was a long toss anyway you look at it. I threw that thing from the 2nd balcony from the top in the middle section that juts out from the building. I'm behind 1 - 0. But it's just the first inning...


Scott said...

make sure you do it before you move to the third floor. It would decrease your odds.

Ron said...

Really? You think? Altitude is related to distance when it comes to flying objects? I knew I should have studied physics.