Monday, April 28, 2008

Television at 65 MPH

It's still there. The TV. It's still in the back of my car. Collecting dust. Causing raised eyebrows, no doubt. (sigh) It's a "cart issue." The apartment complex has carts for people to use on moving day. You know, just like hotels have when you check in or out. You can put stuff on the bottom (like mega-old-tube-TV's) and hang clothing from the bar across the top.

Problem is ... the carts are all booked-up. It's the end of the month and people that are going to move are doing so now. Sooooo... there she sits. All alone. Unplugged. 35 inches of television. If someone would just break into my car and steal her I could claim her on my insurance and invest the return on a hyper-cool new plasma. (Are they heavy too?) They come in a box and that's a whole lot easier to carry. And if they slashed the top of my Mustang to get at her I'd get a new convertible top too. Sweet! Insurance is wonderful when it works. (It's a rip-off when it doesn't.)

But you can't even count on thieves these days.

It's occurred to me that with a power ac/dc converter I could plug the thing in, let the top down on the car, put an antenna on the TV and cruise down I-90 watching Oprah. Of course I'd have to watch in the mirror. And even that wouldn't really work because the TV is still upside down. On the other hand I've seen Oprah a time or two and, in my humble opinion, most of her thinking is already upside down. So maybe she would come out right side up?

I'm putting way too much effort into figuring this out.


Anonymous said...

I like that you're hoping it will be stolen...kind of like I'm hoping we'll get a big hail storm, and insurance will help pay for a new roof and siding!

Anonymous said...

this reminds me of a trip to colorado.
keep your eyes on the road, "jerk".

Ron said...

But it was such a goooood movie!